Sensual Strokes
by Nidia.Ceylon
Summary: With each stroke; she became more alive than she really was.


**~Sensual Strokes~**

Pairing: Kagome and Sai  
>Genre: Romance and Angst<br>Rating: T for some violence and action  
>Summary: With each stroke; she became more alive than she really was.<p>

**Info**: This is written for the Flawless Addiction Contest! A site dedicated to Kagome Crossovers! If you feel this story is worthy then please vote for it on the site! I would deeply appreciate it! There is a link in profile to the site.

* * *

><p><strong>…<strong>  
><strong>A Voice So Distant<strong>  
><strong>…<strong>

* * *

><p><em>~.~.~.~.~.~<em>

_My eyes hold the deepest ocean,  
>Black strands drape the night,<br>Ivory skin ignites the contrast;  
>Crimson is my glow.<br>~.~.~.~.~.~_

Sai's eyes snapped open; there was no peaceful waking or slow rousing from slumber. Years of training had chipped that away; even though he was not of Root, some habits still died hard. Instead, he sat up straight from his futon and observed his surroundings. The room was chilled and everything was in place. His charcoal pencils placed neatly in order at the foot of his futon. There was a black sketchpad sitting next to that and finally there was a plain set of colored pencils. Their lengths varied and the angles of the tips were all facing in the same direction.

Something was off; his skin was warm, yet cool beads of sweat traced trails of nervousness along his spine. He reached up and placed a clammy hand against his slightly heated skin in an attempt to brush away the haunting sensation. He blinked dark eyes as he stared at the plain floorboards and followed the pattern of grain in the wood until he came to the wall of his room. His eyes narrowed as he tried to recall why he was so anxious at his waking.

Nothing had happened.

His dark eyes widen in memory.

They were hazy flashes, but he clearly remembered the vague sensation of something important being lost. He shut his eyes and cleared his mind; not that it was truly troubled. Dreams were usually of no interest to him, but he couldn't help but feel as if there was something more. It was a nagging sensation that roused his curiosity and he wondered if others were curious about dreams; maybe he would ask someone about it.

Sai let his eyes slide open as he stared at his hands. It truly bothered him. Why would he randomly dream about some female? It made no sense since the only females he truly associated with was the 'Ugly' and 'Gorgeous' girl. Those two made quiet a pair when they weren't arguing with each other and they weren't truly as nicknames dubbed them. His eyebrows furrowed against pale and clammy skin as he tried to think of who this girl was. Usually the images played out at night were those of enemies killed in battle; not of random women.

It didn't matter; it was only a dream.

He stretched forward and retrieved the sketchpad and a thin tipped charcoal pencil. Idly he let the metal tip rest against his lip before he adjusted the pad on his knee. Tilting his head left and then right; he rested the tip of his coal on the paper and paused. The corner of his mouth twitched; he had never truly titled his art and didn't see the use of words in something that was supposed to be visually appealing.

Words were after all, only good for conveying messages, but not art.

He tilted the angle of the coal and with a sensual stroke began to elegantly write with as much care as he usually drew.

_Eyes haunted,  
>A tint of darkness,<br>Skin pale with dread;  
>Skin stained rose red.<em>

Art was much like breathing to him; he didn't know exactly how it happened, but something was always brought forth. So, when it happened he didn't notice, but he focused, not with intent, but with the everyday flow of life. What he saw entered his eyes and flowed throughout him, before it exited his hand at the tip of whatever tool he held. He was never surprised and almost always knew what to expect when he looked upon his sketchpad; another compartment of his mind; maybe soul if he had one.

His eyes dark eyes widened a bit at what he saw upon the pad. It was clearly a female face with a strong yet delicate chin. Hair black like oil covered her left eye as her face slightly looked away from him. Her cheekbones were high and slightly curved; the visible eye wide in surprise. Her lips were slightly parted and he noted that they were full. There were stains upon her face; dot like splatters that trailed along her jaw and slid away from her visible eye.

The picture was colorless and the lines thick; but he was confused as to how he knew that the splatters were blood.

~.~.~.~.~.~

He had to take his time. At the moment, he had the supplies on hand to actually draw the woman in his dreams. Briefly; he wondered if this was someone from his past. The training in Root had taken a toll on his mind and made him wish he remembered more, but if a dream was something from the subconscious, then he would follow it with a sliver of hope.

Sai gently placed his sketch book upon the floor. The right of the book rested various wood colored pencils that could easily stand alone or be blended. The left of his book he placed his simple pencil. Since he had dreamed this woman up he decided, helped by the advice of Sakura, that he would draw this woman where he had first dreamt her in attempt to better recall her. He closed his eyes as he calmed his mind and tried to recall something, anything about this woman in his dreams.

Silence reigned as nothing came to him and he wondered if perhaps this wasn't the way to go about things. His dark eyes blandly stared down at the sketchpad.

Why had he dreamt her and why couldn't he draw her?

~.~.~.~.~.~

_I am nobody,  
>But to me;<br>You're my somebody._

~.~.~.~.~.~

* * *

><p><strong>…<strong>  
><strong>Pounding a Fault Line<strong>  
><strong>...<strong>

* * *

><p>Sai's eyes didn't snap open and awareness didn't wake him instantly like normal. His eyes were half-lidded as he continued to gaze upward through inky lashes making reality seem broken and surreal as the morning light danced over him.<p>

He was struggling to hold on.

The visage was blurry, but he could see her.

And she could see him.

_Plump_ _lips colored peach stretched in a true smile._

Awareness smashed into him making him roughly jerk awake. The sheets crumpled around his form as he jumped up. His chest was heaving as sweat beaded along his warmed skin. A slender hand reached up and ran his palm over his forehead and soothed his oily damp bangs out of his eyes. He licked his dry lips and found that it didn't work; his mouth was dry. Dazed from his reaction to such a strange image he continued to stare unwavering at the wall until he silently mouthed a word. He tested the silent word upon his dry lips and found that his temperature increased.

"Kagome."

It was more than a word; it was a name.

Sai dug his fingers into the flesh above his heart as something pained him; it was a sensation that struck worry into him.

It felt as if his heart had suddenly broken. It was a familiar sensation that was accompanied by dread welling up within his gut.

He thought two words that caused even more ache.

'Not again.'

~.~.~.~.~.~

Sai didn't bother to name his artworks. They were countless works that were simply snapshots from his mind with no real meaning. It was with some confusion he wondered why he was doing this; why he had bought a larger and thicker sheet of paper. There had never been a thought in his mind that warranted such attention, but there was something nagging within the suppressed compounds that was demanding attention; recognition.

The first stroke of the pencil didn't take much and held no meaning as he outlined the curve of her jaw.

_Strong, held high with determination, but still delicate._

Her face was like an opal and easy to draw because most people had such a feature; her hair was a thick mass of darkness tinged with the blue of the night sky that came well pass her shoulders. Her bangs framed her face as if drawing special attention to such currently blank spaces. Sai lifted his pencil and stared at the outline; so far there was nothing special.

If one were counting logically; this wouldn't be the second stroke, but he counted it as such because he was creating, no remembering something else. Her eyes were shaped like almonds.

_They held the hue of the ocean at night and reflected a haunted soul._

It was easy to lightly color in her eyes; first a light shade of violent with a hint of white and finally a grace of dark blue. Gently, he used the tip of his pinky to blur the colors again and found himself enjoying the brand of buttery colored pencils and complexity of her eyes. They were dark as he imagined and the white helped lighten certain areas giving her the appearance of being in thought. He quickly switched to a black pencil and drew in her eyebrows with a slight arch making them slender and refined.

Her nose was curved slightly upward and delicate at the rest of her face.

Sai paused as he tilted his head as he objectively observed his work.

_'Sai, you should draw her…isn't she pretty, eh?'_

He slowly let his eyelids fall as he imagined his brother pointing somewhere in the distance. Of course; they were young, but for some reason he felt as this woman in his drawing was related to his past. Sai blinked and realized he had drawn her lips and gently shaded them peach; they were full and he wondered if they were tender like a peach.

This wasn't an important moment, but it was still cautiously done as he began a single stroke to draw the curve of her neck. It was slender and delicate like the rest of his picture; such a fragile looking woman with her high cheekbones and haunted eyes. Sai gently used circular motions to begin shading in her hair black. The sound of the pencil moving filled the silence as he carefully remained with the confines of her strands. It was a just a snapshot of her face, but it was coming along beautifully and without bloodstains.

His fingers gently set the black pencil down before the white and moved to the dark blue which was cradled between the violet and red. Sai carefully added the highlights in her hair and when he finished he barely lifted the colored pencil but continued to gaze at the woman.

"Kagome," Sai muttered.

He had never named any of his art, but he found this one already had a name.

* * *

><p><strong>…<strong>  
><strong>Moments Aside<strong>  
><strong>…<strong>

* * *

><p><em>In Root; they didn't have names, but his brother was weird and used his mission code for his name. It was a delicate situation since they were supposed to suppress their emotions, but Shin insisted on following this and another member of Root.<em>

_A girl._

_She was the same age as Shin, but looked younger like himself. The girl was petite in form, but like a shinobi she carried herself with pride and confidence. Sai tilted his head as he continued to stare at her; he wondered if she took to the training seriously like the other members._

_Sapphire eyes; cold like the ocean suddenly met his gaze. He tensed as her gazes shifted and regarded him with detached interest. Shin placed a hand upon his shoulder and he suddenly saw the girl's eyes widen before they warmed and her lips stretched in welcoming smile._

_ "Shin." Her voice was just as delicate as her features; but filled with strength much like her toned body. Sapphire orbs truly saw him as she asked, "Who's your friend?"_

_ Shin's lips stretched in a goofy smile as he answered with a laugh, "This is my brother, Sai."_

_ Sai looked to her and their eyes met again, but this time his heart began to beat. It pounded in his chest and he was positive she heard it because she giggled with a soft blush._

_ "I'm Kagome."_

~.~.~.~.~.~

That was her name. There was no doubting it because he felt so sure despite not knowing much about her. He knew that she was someone special to Shin. His heart was pounding; she was someone special to him too.

"Are you listening to me you prick!" Naruto's voice shouted.

Sai didn't look at him as he responded, "What do you mean?" He paused and then added, "I don't want to prick you with my dick."

~.~.~.~.~.~

_ Sai kept his dark eyes fixated on Kagome as she withdrew her Tanto. The blade sang as she deflected six shuriken. Kagome twisted away from the next attack and then he witnessed something odd. She twisted her hands on the hilt of her Tanto and pulled. It looked like her weapon was flawed and simply fell apart, but something gleamed in the light of the sun as she held the two separate pieces. Kagome shifted her foot and she was out of sight. The Root member she was battling looked around in confusion; pupils dilated and sweat beading at his forehead._

_ Sai's own dark eyes glanced around the training field wondering where she had vanished. Shin placed a calm hand on his shoulder and grinned as he shut his eyes. _

_ "Listen."_

_ Sai hesitated for a moment, but then he allowed his eyes to slide shut. He could hear the boy breathing; chest rapidly rising with the movements. He couldn't hear anything else and it bothered him. It made him wonder type of technique she had performed to make herself vanish. He tensed; there was a noise; not loud but something so high that it caused his ears to buzz. Sai opened his eyes just in time to see Kagome appear behind the Root Operative. Something gleamed in the light as it went around his throat. She twisted the hilt of the tanto and the blade and tugged._

_ Half her face was shielded by her long black banks and her lips were slightly parted with the strain of using such a move. Her sapphire orb also looked glazed over as blood splattered onto her face and the head of the Root Operative simply snapped forward off the body._

~.~.~.~.~.~

The sound of his door opening didn't bother him as he glanced over. He had decided to take a break anyway. The visions of Kagome were demanding and he found himself eager to draw each moment that he found captivating. So far, he had taken up an entire book of just her. He wanted to perfect her and found himself enthralled with drawing parts of her; eyes, lips, and hands.

"Hello," Sai easily recognized the soft drawl of Sakura.

"Are you still alive you ass!"

Sai glanced around the corner and saw Naruto staring at his bland apartment. The blonde's nose twitched and he itched it before he glanced up and noticed the third member of the team. Sakura offered a calm smile which he noted was not forced.

"It's been a week," Sakura calmly pointed out and he realized it had been a week since he had last seen them. "How are you?"

"Yeah," Naruto grumbled with narrowed eyes. "When the hell did you become a hermit?"

"I'm fine," Sai assured as he motioned them in. Sakura shut the door and slipped her shoes off while Naruto didn't bother. He liked Naruto, but there were times he'd like to kill him. He didn't appreciate him acting rude. Sai didn't express his dislike, but instead moved back into the small kitchen. The sound of heavy footfalls against the wood caused him to blink as he mixed milk into his cereal. When he glanced up, Naruto was frowning at him.

"Who's that?" Naruto suddenly questioned as he lifted his chin and motioned to the small table.

Sai followed his gaze and wondered when he had gotten so disorganized; leaving art around wasn't like him. Sakura's softer steps soon followed and her emerald gaze was focused on what Naruto was staring at.

"Don't be rude," Sakura snapped. "He doesn't name his art."

"Kagome," Sai corrected as her eyes widened. He licked his lips as he suddenly realized that he felt a need to correct them; a need to affirm her existence. "Her name is Kagome." And to answer Naruto's question, his eyebrows furrowed as he questioningly replied, "She was the girl that...I think I loved."

* * *

><p><strong>…<strong>  
><strong>Actions Speak<strong>  
><strong>…<strong>

* * *

><p><em>Kagome was like Shin; if Sai didn't know better he would say that they were related. Yet, that would then make Shin's feelings incestuous which was wrong. So, luckily they weren't related and blindly; Shin truly loved Kagome. Sai wasn't sure how he knew this, but somewhere within his childish heart he recognized that Shin loved her.<em>

_ "What are you drawing Sai?"_

_ The person of his thoughts intruded upon his ponderings with a startling politeness. She made the question seem more like a question of concern. Her eyes were bright with curiosity as she stared at him and not his sketchpad; being once more polite by not prying. Sai blankly stared back at her for a moment._

_ Shin loved her, but he was confused as to how he felt about this girl. It was apparent that they had been trained together, but separated sometime during that training. He wondered why Shin didn't simply confess and cease such weak actions._

_ "It's because Shin's lazy." Kagome gently mused. Sai's eyes widened a bit and she smirked. She lifted her hand and trailed her finger in random patterns about his face as she explained: "…it's written all over your face."_

_ There was something odd about her but he motioned for her to glance at his sketchpad as he answered, "I'm practicing my calligraphy."_

_ Her sapphire eyes brightened even more as she sat beside him. She bit her lower lip and politely asked, "May I?"_

_ He was curious, so he handed her his brush and his cheeks heated when her slender yet calloused fingers brushed his own. Sai muttered something as he handed her his book and watched as she situated herself on the ground with the pad in her lap. He knew they weren't traditional drawing tools, but he couldn't afford much being an orphan._

_ "I love words," Kagome suddenly said as she carefully prepared the brush. "They all have so many meanings especially when spoken."_

_ "They're bland," Sai pointed out with no reluctance. There was nothing artistic about words. You couldn't get anything from a word; they were just letters on paper meant to convey messages._

_ Kagome smiled like usual as she mused, "They are a form of expression."_

_ Sai lifted a brow as he tilted his head and watched her right hand move over the paper. The corners of her lips lifted once more in a knowing smirk. It was, once more as if she knew what thoughts played in his mind. Sai patiently watched her; noting how her hand firmly kept hold of the brush without choking it and how her wrist was relaxed, but not sagging in weakness. Kagome paused in her art and smiled as she set the brush down. She then lifted the pad so Sai could see her words._

_Sensible in actions,  
>Admiring from afar;<br>Ignited in passion._

_ "That isn't written right," Sai pointed out when he had finished reading it._

_ "Maybe I should change the last part to 'ignorant in common sense," Kagome softly pondered._

_ "Is it about Shin?" Sai suddenly questioned. Shin was often reckless during most missions though efficient and he tended to be ignorant of certain common sense areas._

_ Kagome let out a humorless laugh and she suddenly didn't look older than him. It was hard to remember that she was only a year older than himself. Her ninjutsu and taijutsu skills were far more skilled than his own and her attitude far more mature._

_ "You're very passionate about your art," Kagome pointed out; mood suddenly mellow._

_ "We're not supposed to have emotions," Sai calmly pointed out. He felt disappointed._

_ "Oddly." Kagome hummed with her eyes upon his gaze: "…no one can escape their emotions. Bury them, yes, but not erase them. Impossible."_

_ Sai's heart felt warm as she reached out and poked his nose. He watched her as she got up with the grace that proclaimed her skills and walked away without looking back. Sai licked his lips and longingly looked down at the words she had written. His hand moved to pick up his brush and with his own accord he began to write._

_Eyes haunted…_

_~.~.~.~.~.~_

Sai blinked himself back into reality as she stared down at the sketchpad.

Oddly enough; he had drawn a hand holding a brush; holding it in a way he once remembered seeing. His heart clenched and he wondered what this ache was.

~.~.~.~.~.~

_ "I love Shin._

_ Sai clenched his pencil tighter in his hand as he froze in his drawing. This was supposed to be a perfect. He had asked Kagome to be his model; something he had never asked anyone for. He was going to capture her beauty and forever carry it around with him._

_ "He loves you too," Sai calmly pointed out trying to suppress his emotions like Root training demanded._

_ "Not like I love him."_

_ Her eyes looked haunted as she stared at him and he wondered if Danzo had made her discipline—kill another member of Root. Surely she knew that Shin loved her more than a friend. Kagome looked away from him with something like shame upon her features._

_ "He is my brother in arms. I love him like I loved my blood relations." Kagome softly admitted. "I can't love him any different."_

_ It was then that Sai remembered some facts about her. Kagome wasn't an orphan. Her father had sold her into Root to pay off a debt._

_ "Who do you love?" Sai softly questioned as he kept his hands still._

_ It was selfish; but he wanted to know; needed to know. She was right in the sense that they could suppress emotions; but he felt as if he couldn't suppress this emotion he felt for her. His eyes were hopeful and waiting as he watched her look at him with a longing grace of a fallen angel._

_ Shin loved her first._

~.~.~.~.~.~

Sai was frustrated and his teammates knew it by the way his ink lions tore into the training field. It was a massive explosion of dust and ink. It took moment for his chest to stop heaving. When it did stop heaving he found himself oddly calm; he noticed that both Sakura and Naruto were staring at him in disbelief and concern.

"Well." Kakashi slowly drawled. "…I think we should take a break."

Sai exhaled. These memories were taking a toll on him.

~.~.~.~.~.~

_Sai was beyond excited. For once, Shin wouldn't be taking up Kagome's time. They had been assigned a mission. It appeared that there was a Daimyo in the Land of Rain that needed to be taken care of. It was a simple assassination; very simple. The journey would take them a bit; but he didn't care because they would be together away from prying eyes. _

_ He was nervous; it didn't matter that Kagome was meant to be training him or that this was a test of his abilities. Sai quickly stuffed his scroll and brushes into his sack and waited for a moment. He had already grabbed his cloak and was now just waiting. When he blinked, Kagome was before in dressed in her Root's uniform._

_ Her outfit was simple; tight black shorts that came above her knees and a midriff black tank. She bore the normal shin guards, arm guards, and even wore fingerless gloves. Her mask was of that of a dog's face with red stripes upon the cheeks. Her black hair was held back in a braid._

_ Sai wondered why she wore a mask since it wasn't required. They were trained to not be seen and if they were seen then it was because they had already completed the kill._

_ "You will prove yourself able to work in the shadows," Kagome spoke to which Sai nodded. "If you are seen I will kill you."_

_ Her voice was even and Sai knew that there was truth in her words._

~.~.~.~.~.~

Sai was sitting in a tree that grew high enough to overlook the gates of Konoha. It wasn't the same tree from his childhood because that had been destroyed in Pein's invasion. Yet, it was in the same spot Yamato had grown it. Sai shut his eyes and placed his hands upon the cool bark as he gazed over the wall. He glanced idly to his right and blandly gazed at the bark; if it had been the original tree it would've had his, Kagome's and Shin's name carved into the bark.

Much like Shin and Kagome; that tree was gone too.

* * *

><p><strong>…<strong>  
><strong>Night as my Witness<strong>  
><strong>…<strong>

* * *

><p><em> "Why didn't you kill me?"<em>

_ Sai couldn't help the way the question tore from his throat in a scream. The gash across his chest was proof of his failure. Yet, Kagome had been there and reacted fast of enough to kill the target. He stood over the dead body as he gazed at her stiff back. She had killed the target and made to act as if they would just return home. For all he knew; she could be waiting to kill him on the journey back._

_ That wasn't Kagome._

_ "You're orders!" Sai shouted; growled._

_ Finally; she tilted her head and glanced at him. The mask hid her face, but it did nothing to hide the tone of her voice._

_ "You life is worth more to me."_

_ It was so calm and simple; it didn't make sense._

_ "I am nobody!"_

_ Kagome reached up and gripped the chin of her mask and slowly lifted it till it rested crookedly on her face. She slowly crossed the distance and stared into his eyes. Those three words were the core of Root; they weren't allowed identities or emotions. Kagome much like Shin had refused that bit; they kept what they wanted until someday…well he wasn't sure what would happen._

_ Kagome leaned forward and softly said, "But to me." She paused as she licked her lips and he could feel her hot breathe in the muggy weather and smell her scent; traced with honey and blood. "…you're my somebody."_

_ Her lips gently pressed against his._

_ Suddenly all his worries were pushed away as she reached out and traced the symbol for 'love' upon his right cheek. He shivered; it was the most sensual thing he had ever felt._

~.~.~.~.~.~

Sai didn't have many fears.

It was true that he hated Sasuke; because he feared becoming like him. Losing himself and in the process destroying those that were close to his heart. That had proven to be a illogical fear because Sai wasn't Sasuke and he was slowly opening up.

Yet, as he awoke with the covers of his futon sticking his skin like wet paper he realized another fear as he drew his knees in and buried his face in his hands.

The memories of Kagome were filled with warmth; but there was a lingering fear in his heart that they wouldn't end happily.

After all; nothing truly did end happy.

Shin was dead.

Sasuke was dead.

Many had died during the Fourth war.

And Naruto still wasn't Hokage.

* * *

><p><strong>…<strong>  
><strong>On Wings of Darkness<strong>  
><strong>…<strong>

* * *

><p><em>We will give you reason to cry.<em>

_ We don't bury our dead._

_ Those were the words that were cruelly spoken to Kagome as she clung to Shin's dead body. Sai wasn't a medic; but Shin had caught some disease that caused him not to breathe right. It was a slow process; but he fell asleep and didn't wake. _

_ It was the first time Sai had seen tears in Root. Kagome's sapphire orbs filled with mist and simply overflowed; spilling onto the corpse that was Shin. He had warned her that they were coming for the body, but she continued sobbing._

_ The sound of the flesh striking flesh caused his eyes to widen as she was struck away from Shin's body, collapsing to the floor. It was the first time he had truly saw her hit. The act was stunning. Kagome reached up with her long bangs shielding her eyes as she touched the blossoming mark on her face. He saw a tear start to fall._

_ Kagome blurred out of existence; the first operative fell as his head twisted to face her from where she stood behind him. Before the other could react; she had buried her Tanto upward through his mouth; her arm shook as she twisted the blade and glared at him._

_ "At least the Earth won't receive you're ugly flesh," Kagome slowly said as she withdrew her weapon and whipped the blood off._

_ She then sheathed her weapon and moved over toward Shin; it didn't matter that she stepped on bodies. As she kneeled beside him she turned her tearful gaze to Sai._

_ "We are not things!" Kagome sobbed as she choked on her words. "…we are not just tossed out!" She wiped her eyes hard and stressed, "We bury our dead!"_

~.~.~.~.~.~

Shin would've been burned somewhere and forgotten if not for Kagome. They had taken his body near the memorial stone and buried him. She had even carved his name into the stone; it didn't matter if it wasn't his real name; it was what they knew him by. Kagome has been saddened by his death, but was happy that at least he would be remembered.

Naruto had once asked what business he had at the memorial stone and Sai had once responded nothing. It wasn't true; just like others he was visiting a friend. It still held true; he was still visiting a friend's grave.

Sai crossed his arms as his heart clenched; Kagome's name wasn't on the stone.

* * *

><p><strong>…<strong>  
><strong>I Am<strong>  
><strong>…<strong>

* * *

><p><em>Blood drenched her hair as she stood topless in the field. Her arms had been chained to a stake above her head with chest pressed against the wood. Deep gashes coated her back and her lower lip was chewed raw. She hadn't cried or screamed during her punishment. Her eyes were cold as she stared on ahead at those that watched.<em>

_ "Say it!"_

_ Sai saw Danzo in the distance watching the infliction going on. Kagome remained silent and softly gasped as the whip bit into her back._

_ "Say it or I will slice open your soles!"_

_ Kagome smiled; her teeth bloodied. She wouldn't say it because it wasn't true._

_ "I am!" Kagome shouted, spitting blood outward. They all remained silent as they wondered if she would admit to Root's core. "…Kagome!"_

_ She wasn't a nobody._

_ The whip went to crack again, but Danzo intervened and observed the beaten girl as he circled her. His dark eyes flicked to Sai and then to Kagome again._

_ "You claim to be someone?" Danzo questioned as he moved to face her to which she glared at him. "I will free you from Root if you can win your freedom."_

_~.~.~.~.~.~_

Sai gazed down at his sketchpad with a lost look upon his face. It was the same image as always. Kagome with half her face covered by her hair, a single haunted eye visible, and blood splatters upon her face. If he squinted, he could make out a small quirk of her lips.

He supposed this was another picture of her completing a kill.

His heart clenched.

* * *

><p><strong>…<strong>  
><strong>Ashes and Dust<strong>  
><strong>…<strong>

* * *

><p><em> In order to become Root; you had to participate in a battle to the death. It was the final training and something that Sai didn't think much on. <em>

_ He was foolish and he now realized why this was mandatory._

_ It wasn't a normal battle._

_ His dark eyes widened as saw Kagome standing in the distance. Her upper body was wrapped in gauze, but it was stained with her own blood. She carried her Tanto on her back and was sweaty. It was apparent she wasn't well._

_ "Kagome," Sai whispered._

_ He wanted to go to her, but didn't know how to express it. They were on a field being watched while she looked ill with her clammy features._

_ "Sai," Kagome coughed out his name. He watched as blood misted into the air. "…I will kill you."_

_ It was the only warning he received before she came at him. He dodged her first attack with wide eyes. He couldn't believe that she was attacking him. There had been a time that she had disobeyed orders for his life; was he not worth it anymore? They hadn't had the best or most normal relationship, but didn't she love him as she claimed to?_

_ "I can't," Sai murmured as he flipped out of the way of her tanto._

_ Her sapphire eyes narrowed as she spat, "You have to."_

_ Her blade sliced into his arm and he hissed as he moved away from her and reached for his scroll. Kagome was upon him in a flash as she smacked his scroll away._

_ "Draw your weapon!" Kagome snapped; voice not normal._

_ Sai had no choice in order to block her wild swing. He twisted to escape her wrath and noticed Danzo watching with a smirk. Sai understood now; she had to kill him in order to gain freedom. That's what Danzo had told her just hours ago. It had to be adrenaline and hope that kept her moving. She had been willing to save his life; he owed her his life. His grip on his weapon loosened._

_ "Don't you dare!" Kagome shouted at him as she briefly paused. "I'll never forgive you!"_

_ He watched as she threw her Tanto to the ground and his grip tightened once more. Sai didn't want to harm her, but he watched as her hands came together in a single movement._

_ "Inugami-Mochi: Possession!"_

_ Kagome grit her teeth as her hands came apart. Her canine teeth extended and the black of her pupils became slits. Her black hair became feral in a wild fashion and her nails turned to claws. He watched as two crimson stripes graced each cheek. With the transformation came murmuring from those around him. She looked wild; dangerous._

_ Kekkai Genkai._

_ She never uses this._

_ Her nose twitched and her speed increased as she disappeared. Sai tried to focus but here was nothing to track her by. The scrapping of claws against dirt warned him and he panicked. He twisted and avoided her claws; debris exploded around them with the attack and he wondered why she never resorted to such a jutsu before in her missions. A howl filled the air and he lifted his blade just in time to deflect her. As the dust cleared he caught sight of her form only for it to vanish._

_ "I don't want to do this," he muttered as he dodged away and let his eyes scan the ground for his scroll. If he could get to his scroll then he could restrain her._

_ "Foolish."_

_ It was a guttural female voice, but it was enough warning for him. He turned on his heel and blood splattered his face. He didn't know why he couldn't see, but when he blinked his vision was clear. Kagome was standing before him with a blood splattered face and a smirk. He could only see one eye; but it was haunted like the ocean was haunted by darkness. Sai felt her hands; cool as she placed them over his hands that gripped his weapon that was driven through her gut. Her finger idly traced the symbol for love upon his skin._

_ "Your life is worth much to me," Kagome muttered to him._

_ Sai was gripping the blade, but her hands were controlling it as she twisted the blade deeper into her gut. A strangle gasp left her mouth as she fell to her knees and stared up at him._

_ "My choice," Kagome whispered as she fell to her side._

_ He fell to his knees beside her; his hands were hesitant to touch her as she rasped for air that wouldn't grace her. There was something akin to content upon her face as she gazed him. When she finally exhaled her last moment of life Sai saw her smile. He gazed at her body for what seemed like endless moments. She wasn't going to move; ever._

_ Sai had lost Shin and now Kagome._

_ His heart didn't feel as if it worked anymore._

_ He felt…numb._

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><p><strong>…<em><br>_When Shadows Remain**  
><strong>…<strong>

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><p>"Why are you here?" Naruto questioned as he crossed his arms behind his head and glanced to Sai.<p>

It was odd; his teammate had been hiding in his apartment for weeks only to just randomly appear at the memorial. Even now, Sai remained silent as he stopped and stared at the stone.

"Do you see the name Shin there?" Sai softly questioned.

Naruto wondered what was going on, but he read over the names of the fallen and confirmed the name was there. He also noticed that it was carved differently than the others.

"Do you see a," Sai paused not really wanting to ask. "…Kagome."

"No," Naruto slowly answered.

He had never seen that name around nor had he ever heard of it. Sai fell to his knees and Naruto watched with wide eyes as he placed his hand upon the stone and bowed his head.

"I couldn't protect her," Sai softly muttered as his shoulders shook, but no tears came.

Kagome; Naruto recognized the name as the girl from the drawings and he asked once more, "Who was she?"

It was the most emotion he had ever heard Sai speak with as he answered, "The girl I loved."

Sai felt deep shame as his heart wallowed in the sorrow he felt. Kagome had given her life to make sure he lived and what had he done; suppressed the memories of her and Shin. She had always assured him that he was somebody, but he had turned himself into a nobody in Root.

Root must've given her body the proper disposal by burning her and leaving her ash to soak into the ground. He didn't remember what exactly happened after she died, but he knew that he was a horrible person for not doing for her what she did for Shin.

Could she forgive him for this if she were alive?

There were too many emotions do describe the sorrow he felt, but from this moment on he silently vowed that he would become the somebody that she thought him to be.

Naruto's hand upon his shoulder caused him to twitch but he looked to the blonde as Naruto spoke, "If you cared that much for her...then I'm sure she's still watching over you." Naruto gave him a wide and honest smile that spoke of love and pain as he stated, "Besides, you shouldn't honor the dead by mourning what you couldn't do. Show her honor by appreciating what she did do and live for her."

Sai gazed at Naruto in astonishment, it was moments like these he was reminded of why Naruto would one day be Hokage. The boy had a gift of honesty that spoke truth. He let his gaze fall the memorial stone, but he didn't smile.

He would live for her and he would become the somebody she always knew he was.

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><p><strong>~.~.~The End~.~.~<strong>

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><p><span>Author's Note:<span>

This story was written for the Flawless Addiction Kagome and Sai challenge! It is a site dedicated to Kagome Crossovers! If you feel this story is worthy than please nominate it at the site! There is a link in my profile!

Much love and special thanks to all of you who read my stories!

Questions, Concerns, Comments...please leave them

PS: If you notice something odd about this; errors than please mention it in a review ;p


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